Tony's Wisdom - Use song lyrics to get pussy

by John Burke

It was a long weekend when Tony passed this knowledge on to me. I was up early, to start my drinking session.

"You know what works well to get the pussy wet?" Tony asks me.
"Money?" I state straight faced.
"Poetry," says Tony, ignoring my response, "using song lyrics."
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a sheet of paper and starts to recite lyrics to me:

Tonight you're mine, completely
You give your soul so sweetly
Tonight the light of love is in your eyes
But will you love me tomorrow

Is this a lasting treasure
Or just a moment's pleasure
Can I believe the magic in your sights
And will you love me tomorrow

Tonight with words unspoken
You say that I'm the only one
But will my heart be broken
When the night meets the morning sun

I'd like to know if your love
Is a love I can be sure of
So tell me now and I won't ask again
Will you still love me tomorrow
Will you still love me tomorrow
Will you still love me tomorrow

"Who wrote those?" I ask.
"Carol King" says Tony.
"You should use something by Guns N' Roses like 'Back off Bitch'. I say.
"Don't be such a smart ass. I'm trying to pass on knowledge to you."
"Okay," I say kind of surprised I easily offended Tony. "I'll be on the look out for good song lyrics."
"Cool. Hey it's getting late what to go to a bar?"