I reply, "Yes I do." Not knowing who the fuck Mike Parker is.

The girl drops down to her knees, unzips my pants, takes out my cock and starts sucking my cock.

I am stunned I'm getting a blowjob just like that. Reality is stranger then fiction.

The girl stands up after five minutes of cock sucking. The other blonde drops to her knees and starts sucking me off.

"I'm going to cum," I say, in my dick being sucked voice.

"Cum in her mouth, she swallows," say the girl who had her lips around my cock first.

I blow my load in the girl's mouth. She takes it all, not spilling a drop.

She stands up, helps me pull my pants up and says, "Say hello to Mike Parker for us."

She winks and they both leave.

"Thanks Mike Parker," I say with a shit eating grin to no one in particular. "Who ever you are."

Tony Marianne was with me. We decide to pool our money and go on the hunt after the rare species of human who will sell there vagina for crack money. Driving our crackmobile over to the seedy part of town, we locate two crack whores working the pavement.

We start our approach.

“How much to fuck?,” Tony, ever the gentleman, asks.
The real slutty looking crackwhores ask “Are you a cop?”
“Bet your sweet ass I’m a cop,” says Tony.
“Then for you its 20 bucks,” said the crackwhore.

The Toronto crackwhore is special type of crackwhore. They can be rough. Have a well worn face. Crack can take it’s physical toll on a human body.

These two were, from the looks of it,in the beginning stages of their crack journey.

One was a chubby blond. The other was thin with long black hair. These whores were the ones we were going to get our cocks wet with.

The blonde gets in the seat up in the front with me.

“I’m Karla,” she says.
“John,” I say. That’s the best part of having that name. There are so many Johns. Plus she will only remember me as a john.

Tony is sitting in the backseat. With his cock out. How do I know Tony has his cock out? He is trying to to force the whores mouth on his cock.
“Shit, wait till we get to the spot and we can fuck there,” she says.

Tony stops and moves to the other side of the car seat giving the crackwhore her space.

I drive to our fuck spot making small talk to the whore in the front.

“You do this a lot?” she ask me.
“No not that often,” I lie.

My theory is: By lying to crackwhores that I do not fuck them often, they will believe it. And will fuck me with out a condom. My plan is to fuck all the crackwhores in Toronto without a condom. This way I can get off the best way. Having unprotected sex is the best. I love fucking these chicks without a condom.

Some of the whores will get pregnant by my sperm. Most will abort the pregnancy. But one may see the child to full term. This child may be adopted. And will be a put on the path to a successful life.

Blondie says something to me, but I do not know what the fuck she is saying. I take my cock out and start to stroke it.

“How do you want to do this?” asks the Blonde in the whore in the front to the whore in the back.

“You blow’em and I’ll fuck em,” says the whore in the backseat.
“Sounds good,” says Tony.

The blonde starts to suck my cock. She gave decent head.

After a few minutes we switch up and it is my turn to get some fucking in the backseat. I get out from the drivers seat and waddle with pants around my ankles to the backseat. I feel the night breeze on my, wet from just getting a blowjob, cock.

I open the door and say, “Hello,” to the crackwhore in the back.

“Hey,” she says.

We start to fuck missionary style.

“Cannot believe I’m asking this,” I say, “but is it in?”

“You just felt what it feels like to through a cucumber down a hallway,” says Tony from the frontseat getting his dick sucked.
“What the fuck do you mean if its in?” asked crackwhore below me asking undignified.

I pretend I cum.

Title: Will shovel for blowjob
Body:
Hi there,
I will shovel your drive way for a blowjob.
I will come over, shovel your driveway and when complete you will perform oral on me. This can be an on going situation.
About myself: Male, in 30′s, tall dark and handsome.
Email me back
—-
Post this at the first snow storm of the year. You will have to be patient. You will receive some responses and from these you will have to filter out the shit from the real ones.
Protip:
Ask for a phone number to verify you are talking to a women. Craigslist is full of jokers and time wasters.
With a little luck, patience you will have your knob polished when it snows.
Oh yeah don’t forget to shovel the driveway.

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Below are lines designed to cause verbal pain in the person who is sucking your cock. Use at your own discretion.

1. After giving you a blow job. “Don’t kiss me with your dick smelling breath ho.”

2. “You should change your name to Black and Decker Pecker wrecker.”

3. “Next time you offer to suck me off- don’t.”

4. “I never had but I know I can give better head then that.”

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